Hi,
“I was watching pornographic content on TV; you know the MTV, Channel V, English movies etc. After some time, I felt unusual deterioration in my imagination. I was thinking about Arnold Schwarzenegger to be my girlfriend.”
Just by reading the above mentioned words, much of the world got something to laugh about, others got something for their own storyline and the remaining just starred.
This is what taste is all about for the readers. Whereas I wanted to say something altogether different. That is the gamdu adivasis that I have mentioned earlier have been trying very hard to influence fear in me of getting raped. I was even surprised to recall that many on the internet chat rooms had taken pleasure in demeaning me of the aftereffects. I never understood some years ago. Hey, when a man says that he has dated a woman. Cause as there are no conclusive things going on in Indian society, it might be that the man actually dates another man! And maybe the marriage would be just bringing together, you know what arrange means!
Just by reading the above paragraph the womankind might be rejoicing for the opportunity they think would get as if I was talking for/about them!
One more thing that I wanted to say- who the fuck are you calling eunuch! I think you all men and women are eunuchs! The people in power might like to come on TV to retaliate this statement. Whereas I have a much better term to describe you all. This term I’ve had myself invented in the year 1993. And it was ‘The iLLi people’ hahahaha. I would like to explain if you can’t understand. Like if I had a car, and I would have gone for a drive to a distant suburb. Just then a porky Indian in his own car drove beside me and turned me scare by his ugly looks. Then I said to myself- who the hell is this guy! Then he dashed and drove speedily away. Then another one came, and another one and another one. Even the two-wheelers dropped their looks and gnawed with their teeths. Some kind of a fiasco going on. Even when I visited offices and even college! The same kind of worst behaviors can be observed.
The place where I used to live earlier had a lower Sikh tribe whose job was to catch ‘stray pigs’. I was once going to school and I saw a huge truck parked. In its carrier, there were lots of bouncing pigs tied by their legs. I feel amused just the same when I see the Mumbai’s local trains.
Moreover I even came across lots of third-class unknown people who have this typical kind of body language ‘inviting me to their homes! There is also a trend that group of men who have no education are sharing a particular identity life like job, money etc.! These go unchecked which promotes corruption in a truer sense! Lol
------------------- phantom
hellworld USA
Sometimes when I watch the News it washes over me like slime dripping from the mouth of a monster. It oozes and smells and wants to penetrate every pore of my mind. The News reader speaks words of horror yet is not him or herself horrified. No one is suppose to feel anything when the News Monster slimes our minds everynight, and rapes our souls with lies so outrageous later generations will think us to have all been mad.
I scream at the TV sometimes. I yell back at the monster who shows me night after night politicians giving justification to more USA state sponsored terror in the name of spreading Democracy. I even talk back to God in deep meditation, sometimes. What the F**K are you doing bleeding our souls empty of hope!!!!!, I say to Her/Him. I know They don't mind my rage. They feel it too watching us destroy the Creation and each other with such self righteous abandon.
Sometimes I will hear a thoughtful one, like Bill Moyers, wonder out loud why no one is in the streets. We are all hiding under the bed, Bill, I say. Did you forget Bill that you were there with LBJ when we entered hellword the last time with Vietnam?
The local News Monster parades all the bad that can happen too. This person's house burned down. That grandmother was raped and slain in a home invasion. This fast food joint had roaches in its soup. Don't leave your house the News Monster says. Lock all the doors!
Meanwhile, in a Washington built upon a swamp and drowning in ammorality so deep and profound the Founders weep and gnash their souls against the darkest night, a real Monster rides our Nation with child-like glee, patiently ruining and poisoning everything he touches. While Steiner lectures on The Fall of the Spirits of Darkness advising us that this is just the beginning, and if we don't like the preview happening today, just wait until the full release of the film. Stephen King can't begin to write the horrors waiting around the corner in the dark alleyway of our worst nightmares.
I saw a movie, and have it now on tape. Children of Men its called. England twenty years from now, thirdworlded into a police state. Then the News Monster tells me of the English politician who is getting it all ready right now today by making sure you can be searched when you get on the train to go to work and by the way, when you leave the country, you first have to surrender all your secret information to the State. Even Orwell's 1984 didn't have the courage to imagine the reality we run toward, while anthroposophists gaze at their navels and wander in rooms full of books.
Moyers wants us to mount to the streets again like was done in the Vietnam era. Well Bill, come visit me under my bed first, and then we can talk about it.
What am I doing, you might ask? Something silly and foolish I hope. I have my computer under my bed with me, and I use it to talk to all the other ones under their beds. Maybe we can find the dream way through the monsters and and the madness. Maybe there are secrets in the mind that will lead us to the thoughts needed to at least, if not save us from the horror and the hellworld raining down on us from out of the future, these thoughts will show us how to stand within the rain of pain and despair, and not lose hope or faith or love. Can PoF give us that, and can we somehow find a way to be that and demonstrate that and share that with the rest who are hiding under their beds with their computers? So many questions, so little time.
joel
For all the wonderful people in the world
Dear Phantom,
I read your journals and sometimes they make me chuckle but this time you have made me sad.
How to balance in our thoughts and imagination, in our heart forces, all the ugly wanton violence that we see existing in our world. When I was in college, I would worry excessively about the wars going on around the world, about the ugliness you read in the newspapers, and I pondered the essence of evil in our world and what it all meant. Now, having a little life experience, I don't read the newspapers for the most part, or watch the idiotic sensationalistic news on the television, if I read the news it is usually on the internet. I use to watch the BBC news but even that has become sensationalistic and not worth watching. The news that is presented to us is of the worst of human nature.
I have achieved some balance in my life because I have met so many wonderful, extraordinary people, people who are kind and really concerned about others not just themselves. Because of my job and travels I have met these wonderful people in all walks of life, in many different countries. I have in my memory and heart many stories of the kindnesses that have been shown to me by others, and hopefully I have shown kindness and love to others. The world (the natural world) is incredibly beautiful, so beautiful sometimes it leaves me speechless. If there is any evil in the world it is in the hearts and minds of some men and women, but not all. The earth is incredibly beautiful, and sometimes you can go into a small village in a country we would consider poor or backward and find the most extraordinarily wonderful people.
So Phantom, maybe it might help you if you started noticing some of the beauty in the people around you instead of always focusing on what you see as their faults. Also, maybe take a notice of how beautiful nature is, the earth is. I know this is hard when one lives in a huge metropolis, but maybe just a quite walk by the water in Mumbai or a walk in the countryside outside of Mumbai.
I'm not saying there are not great problems in the world, but I don't think we really serve others or can even possibly attempt to solve some of the problems if we don't experience love for others. Look at the wonderful work someone like Muhammad Yunus is doing in serving the poor.
Your writing is most interesting and I look forward to your next journal.
Love,
Patri
Modern Heros
The world has many unknown contemporary heros working in science, as activists, and in spiritual groups. As a feature of a POF redo, rather than old German philosophers feature contemporary biographies of outstanding ethical individualists who are changing the world.